A Suitable Helper

This Sunday the message was brought by a guest, Bro. Ashok, who serves with the Vishwa Vani gospel mission (விஸ்வவாணி நற்செய்தி பணி). Before opening the Scriptures he shared news from the mission field: indigenous workers trained and sent to unreached villages across India, missionaries facing police questioning in Rajasthan, and new believers confessing Christ in Uttar Pradesh. He reminded us that for two hundred years missionaries from every nation were planted in this Tirunelveli soil, many of them buried here, and that what was sown here has gone out to all of India. He asked the church to keep praying for those who now carry the same seed.

Then he turned to the first Scripture reading of the day and preached from a single sentence in it.

"And the LORD God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.'" - Genesis 2:18 (NKJV)

"பின்பு தேவனாகிய கர்த்தர்: மனுஷன் தனிமையாயிருப்பது நல்லதல்ல, ஏற்ற துணையை அவனுக்கு உண்டாக்குவேன் என்றார்." - ஆதியாகமம் 2:18 (TAOVBSI)

Made in His Image (அவருடைய சாயலில்)

Genesis opens with the earth without form and void, darkness on the face of the deep, and the Spirit of God moving upon the waters. The preacher lingered on that picture: the Spirit over the waters at creation, and in the Gospels the Lord walking on the sea. The Old Testament and the New are joined; the same God shows His glory in both, and the Spirit stirs in us a desire to read the whole Book.

Watch how God creates. He says "Let there be light," and there is light. He speaks, and the firmament stands; He speaks, and the seas gather to one place and the dry land appears. Day after day the record repeats one refrain: God saw that it was good. Everything came into being by a word.

Everything except man. For man alone, God does not merely speak.

"Then God said, 'Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion... So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.'" - Genesis 1:26-27 (NKJV)

"பின்பு தேவன்: நமது சாயலாகவும் நமது ரூபத்தின்படியேயும் மனுஷனை உண்டாக்குவோமாக... தேவன் தம்முடைய சாயலாக மனுஷனைச் சிருஷ்டித்தார், அவனைத் தேவசாயலாகவே சிருஷ்டித்தார்; ஆணும் பெண்ணுமாக அவர்களைச் சிருஷ்டித்தார்." - ஆதியாகமம் 1:26-27 (TAOVBSI)

The LORD God formed man from the dust of the ground with His own hands and breathed the breath of life into his nostrils, and man became a living soul. He planted a garden eastward in Eden and set the man He had formed in it. The world tells another story - that man climbed up from the monkeys. To a heart in which the Holy Spirit dwells, that account sounds almost comical. God does not do shoddy work. We were made carefully, beautifully, in His likeness, and given dominion over everything He had made.

That is why no loss cancels your worth. You may be without work; your life partner may not understand you; you may have lost someone you should never have had to lose. Whatever has happened, Scripture still says:

"Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows." - Matthew 10:31 (NKJV)

"ஆதலால், பயப்படாதிருங்கள்; அநேகம் அடைக்கலான் குருவிகளைப்பார்க்கிலும் நீங்கள் விசேஷித்தவர்களாயிருக்கிறீர்கள்." - மத்தேயு 10:31 (TAOVBSI)

Before Eve was formed (ஏவாளுக்கு முன்பே)

The preacher pointed out a detail many readers pass over. God placed the man in the garden to tend and keep it, and gave him the command: of every tree you may freely eat, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day you eat of it you shall surely die. Read those verses again and ask: where was Eve? She had not yet been formed. The command about the tree was given to Adam alone, before the woman existed. The serpent knew it, and that is why he went to Eve - she had not heard the command from God's own mouth, and if she could be persuaded, she would know how to bring the man to eat.

Death was not part of man's original making. But when disobedience entered, a limit had to be set on a creature who was reaching to become like God on his own terms, so that he could be brought to a new birth.

It Is Not Good to Be Alone (தனிமை நல்லதல்ல)

Through the whole creation account one verdict repeats: God saw that it was good. Then, for the first time, God looks at something and says the opposite. The man is alone, and it is not good.

We see what loneliness does in the homes we visit. The children have gone away for work and settled in other places; the father and mother remain alone in the house. A sudden illness comes, a sudden weakness, and there is no one even to ask for help. And loneliness works on the inside too. When a person is alone, thoughts multiply; thoughts we should never entertain find their way in, and climbing back out of them is beyond our own strength. God who made us knew all this, and He said it plainly: it is not good.

So He made a suitable helper - ஏற்ற துணை. For everyone, God prepares the companion who fits. The preacher was careful here: this companion is not a permanent possession. "I am a husband to my wife and she is a wife to me, but this is not an eternal bond - for the span of this life God has given us a fitting companion, and our calling is to love them and glorify God together." Marriage is not an accident of this world. It is appointed beforehand: the right person joined to the right person, by God, as a family.

Bone of My Bone (என் எலும்பில் எலும்பு)

God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, took one of his ribs, closed up the flesh, fashioned the rib into a woman, and brought her to the man. God Himself gives the bride away.

"And Adam said: 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.'" - Genesis 2:23 (NKJV)

"அப்பொழுது ஆதாம்: இவள் என் எலும்பில் எலும்பும், என் மாம்சத்தில் மாம்சமுமாயிருக்கிறாள்; இவள் மனுஷனில் எடுக்கப்பட்டபடியினாலே மனுஷி என்னப்படுவாள் என்றான்." - ஆதியாகமம் 2:23 (TAOVBSI)

The world speaks the language of sameness - men and women are simply one and the same, it says. Scripture speaks the language of order and honour. Adam was not deceived; it was the woman who was deceived, and God has set us within this order for our protection. Far from demeaning women, the preacher argued, the Bible exalts them. When a family is to be built, it is the woman God uses to build it.

"The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands." - Proverbs 14:1 (NKJV)

"புத்தியுள்ள ஸ்திரீ தன் வீட்டைக் கட்டுகிறாள்; புத்தியில்லாத ஸ்திரீயோ தன் கைகளினால் அதை இடித்துப்போடுகிறாள்." - நீதிமொழிகள் 14:1 (TAOVBSI)

Then he gave his own testimony. "I never went to school. But God helped me to read this Book. It was my wife's prayer that turned me into a servant of God standing before you preaching from it. After I began to read this Book with hunger, salvation came into our house, blessing came, peace came. We have no debt trouble - and I have no great earning power. God does it wonderfully." Not by might, nor by power, but by His Spirit.

And because husband and wife are one flesh, he added a practical word: let there be no secrets in the family's income and expenses. When a husband handles money the wife does not know about, or a wife the husband does not know about, it is wrong, and one day it will become a danger; it eats away the peace of the home.

What God Has Joined (தேவன் இணைத்தது)

The second reading of the day was Matthew 19, where the Pharisees test Jesus on divorce, and Jesus takes them back to this very passage - "He who made them at the beginning made them male and female... and the two shall become one flesh."

"So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." - Matthew 19:6 (NKJV)

"இப்படி இருக்கிறபடியினால், அவர்கள் இருவராயிராமல், ஒரே மாம்சமாயிருக்கிறார்கள்; ஆகையால், தேவன் இணைத்ததை மனுஷன் பிரிக்காதிருக்கக்கடவன் என்றார்." - மத்தேயு 19:6 (TAOVBSI)

Once God has joined a husband and wife, no one may pull them apart. Scripture allows separation on one ground alone - adultery - and even that is a concession, not a command. When they asked why Moses permitted a certificate of divorce, Jesus answered: because of the hardness of your hearts. From the beginning it was not so.

Yet look at our own community. The preacher said that if you examine the divorce petitions in the courts today, Christians are heavily represented among those filing them - he put the figure at 81 percent. So this is not a matter for the world out there; it is a matter for our prayer groups. Pray by name that no husband and wife in our families come to separation.

He warned too of where the world is heading - of moves to normalise, even legalise, keeping one "family" at the workplace and another at home. When people walk a ruinous road like that, the wrath of God comes on men; then disease multiplies, sin multiplies, and death multiplies.

The years God intends (தேவன் குறித்த ஆயுசு)

From there the preacher asked an unexpected question: how many years is a man's life? Seventy, we answer, or eighty by reason of strength. But who said that? Moses said it, in Psalm 90. What did God Himself say about man?

"And the LORD said, '...his days shall be one hundred and twenty years.'" - Genesis 6:3 (NKJV)

"அப்பொழுது கர்த்தர்: ...அவன் இருக்கப்போகிற நாட்கள் நூற்றிருபது வருஷம் என்றார்." - ஆதியாகமம் 6:3 (TAOVBSI)

We hold tightly to the number a man spoke and let go of the number God spoke. And Moses himself, at a hundred and twenty, climbed the mountain with his eyes undimmed and his natural vigour unabated - strength enough to climb, sight enough to see Canaan. So do not be discouraged over weakness. What God made is still the best work there is.

The Virtuous Wife (குணசாலியான ஸ்திரீ)

The preacher closed his message in Proverbs 31, the portrait of the wife whose worth is far above rubies.

"Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain." - Proverbs 31:10-11 (NKJV)

"குணசாலியான ஸ்திரீயைக் கண்டெடுப்பவன் யார்? அவளுடைய விலை முத்துக்களைப்பார்க்கிலும் உயர்ந்தது. அவள் புருஷனுடைய இருதயம் அவளை நம்பும்; அவன் சம்பத்துக் குறையாது." - நீதிமொழிகள் 31:10-11 (TAOVBSI)

Where such a woman is in a home, its wealth does not shrink; it keeps growing. All the days of her life she does her husband good and not evil. She rises while it is yet night and gives food to her household. She lays her hands to the spindle; she opens her hand to the poor. Her household is clothed in scarlet, so she does not fear the cold for them. Strength and honour are her clothing; she rejoices over the days to come and does not worry. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.

He held that portrait against our own day without apology. Many women have studied and become capable - good - but some have forgotten the Book along the way. What time do we rise? "Mother is there, she will manage" must not be the spirit of a household. If the home is to be blessed, Scripture says the woman is to be the reason for it. A generation ago, quarrels spilled out of houses into the street, pots breaking, voices raised; today the Lord has placed us in a church that teaches us to open the mouth with wisdom instead. That itself is grace.

And the honour runs in both directions:

"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them." - Colossians 3:18-19 (NKJV)

"மனைவிகளே, கர்த்தருக்கேற்கும்படி, உங்கள் புருஷருக்குக் கீழ்ப்படியுங்கள். புருஷர்களே, உங்கள் மனைவிகளில் அன்புகூருங்கள், அவர்கள்மேல் கசந்துகொள்ளாதிருங்கள்." - கொலோசெயர் 3:18-19 (TAOVBSI)

Note the word "own" - to your own husbands. And note how the two commands feed each other. Where the wife honours, love rises in the husband; where the husband comes home with a smiling face, submission comes easily to the wife; where he comes home with irritation, it does not. Each obedience makes the other light.

Scripture sets couples before us on both sides of the ledger. Adam and Eve; Isaac, who prayed for his wife Rebekah; Aquila and Priscilla, the tentmaking couple in Acts 18 who took Paul into their home and then left with him for the work of the gospel. And on the other side, Ahab and Jezebel, Ananias and Sapphira. Which kind of family are we? He asked the church to take one minute and pray over that question.

Then he ended where the picture has always been pointing. On earth the church is the bride; in heaven the Bridegroom is Jesus Christ. God gives us these good earthly bonds to show us heaven. The suitable helper is a signpost to the Marriage that lasts.

Together, Not Apart (பிரிந்து வாழக்கூடாது)

When Bro. Ashok finished, the word was carried one step further from the same passage before the offering - one or two points, because they are truths every family needs.

Who leaves whom in marriage? The man leaves his father and his mother and is joined to his wife, and the two become one flesh. And having been joined, when may a husband and wife live apart? Scripture gives exactly one occasion:

"Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again..." - 1 Corinthians 7:5 (NKJV)

"ஜெபத்திற்கும் உபவாசத்திற்கும் தடையிராதபடிக்கு, இருவரும் சிலகாலம் பிரிந்திருக்கவேண்டுமென்று சம்மதித்தாலன்றி, ஒருவரையொருவர் அந்நியப்படுத்தாதிருங்கள்..." - 1 கொரிந்தியர் 7:5 (TAOVBSI)

For fasting and prayer, for a season, by consent - and for nothing else. Nowhere does the Bible say a wife may live in India while her husband lives in Dubai because the house needs money. Many go abroad out of real hardship, and they do earn. But ask around honestly: of the families that lived divided this way, how many have you seen end up blessed and together? They earn much, and at the end the children and the household are each scattered in a different direction. The morning Psalm had already said it:

"Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it." - Psalm 127:1 (NKJV)

"கர்த்தர் வீட்டைக் கட்டாராகில், அதைக் கட்டுகிறவர்களின் பிரயாசம் விருதா." - சங்கீதம் 127:1 (TAOVBSI)

If a couple does not live by the word, they will still earn, still accomplish what they set out to do - and it will all come to no profit. Everyone doing something does not make it right, and it will never make the truth change. People may move away from the truth; the truth does not move. If circumstances have truly forced a family apart, then call that situation what it is - a curse - and remember that Jesus Christ was nailed to the cross precisely to redeem us from the curse. Cry out to Him, and He is able to lift it and bring husband and wife under one roof again. Husband, wife and children living as one - that, and nothing less, is the will of God. Even after a quarrel, one house, one room, one bed.

Children Are a Heritage (பிள்ளைகள் கர்த்தரால் வரும் சுதந்தரம்)

The same morning Psalm gave the second point.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward." - Psalm 127:3 (NKJV)

"இதோ, பிள்ளைகள் கர்த்தரால் வரும் சுதந்தரம்; கர்ப்பத்தின் கனி அவரால் கிடைக்கும் பலன்." - சங்கீதம் 127:3 (TAOVBSI)

Children are God's inheritance given to us - not labourers given to work for us. God has appointed for each child a family of their own one day, a future of their own, and it is His will that we give them a good education and set them on their feet. Where children are kept back from studying and sent to work "so the family can survive", the word of God has simply not been known. And do not treat a wife or a child as a servant of the house; God will not bless a home run that way. Release them to live by the word, and what they owe the home they will do gladly. A house built with love is a blessing; where there is only scolding and force, God does not stay.

Raising children God's way has two seasons. While they are small, correction - the rod, used in love:

"Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him." - Proverbs 22:15 (NKJV)

"மதியீனம் பிள்ளையின் நெஞ்சில் ஒட்டியிருக்கும்; தண்டனையின் பிரம்பு அதை அவனுக்குத் தூரமாக்கும்." - நீதிமொழிகள் 22:15 (TAOVBSI)

He who spares the rod hates his son. What does not bend at five will not bend at fifty. Yes, the child will cry - and tears now are far better than ruin later. Indulgent affection that lets a child drift is a love that destroys the soul. Then, as they grow, the rod gives way to counsel: advice, wisdom, patient shaping toward a life lived by the word. And there is no news that gladdens a parent more than this: my children are walking in the truth.

Parents and parents-in-law were given the same searching question: your son or daughter is married now - are you allowing them to live as Scripture says? The mother who complains "he listened to me till yesterday; now that a wife has come he no longer regards me" is nursing a wrong thought. It was God who gave him that wife. Step a little to the side, bless them, give counsel when it helps - and let the couple honour and care for their parents in turn. That is the order that carries blessing.

Conclusion (முடிவுரை)

Everything in this message stands on one foundation: வசனத்தின்படி வாழணும் - live by the word. Husband and wife together, never apart. Wives honouring, husbands loving, money open between them. Children corrected in love, educated, released into God's plan. Parents honoured; in-laws blessing rather than gripping. A family like that, God delights to bless - He prospers the work of their hands, and there is no reason such a household should not ask Him for the full span of years He named, a hundred and twenty, walking in health as a testimony to many.

The service closed with every family standing before the Lord with one prayer: "Lord, this is what Your word says, and this is how I want to live. My circumstances do not make obedience easy - but be gracious to me; I hand You my family this morning. Change what must change, and let us live by Your word." To the family that surrenders like that, the promise is sure: He changes the circumstances, and the whole house lives pleasing to God.